Tuesday, January 19, 2016

Day Nine-Strength

Today I want to talk about strength, about being a strong person. I guess I have always thought of myself as a strong person. I do not need to lean on others for moral support, I do not need peer support, friend support, family support. Of course, it is nice to have support, but I feel I am strong enough to go about my business and do what I need to do in life without the support of others. In fact sometimes I shun support, I shun groups, I shun authority, I shun situations where I feel I need to subordinate myself to rules and regulations. I think this is probably arrogance. I often feel I am insufferable and way too big for my own boots.

However, this is not what I wanted to talk about, I want to talk about being a strong person for others to follow. I have never thought of myself as a leader and have also shunned any situation where I might have to take the lead. I do not feel competent to lead a group, I do not feel I have what it takes, because I cannot convince others of my own truth. Other people may have different truths to follow, different ways of doing things, so who am I to point the way? I can only be one example of how things might be done. If it appeals to others, all well and good, they can take my cue if they wish. If not, let them find a different example to follow, an example that suits their own personal needs and evolution better. So this is why I do not feel comfortable leading. It is not that I doubt my own strength, I just do not feel right telling other people what to do. Even when they ask. All I can say is, do what feels right to you.

I do not wish to get burned out. I know Knowledge is true, Knowledge is the guiding force in the Universe and I am pursuing its redemption within me as best I can. I am no oracle or wise woman. What I say has little impact on anyone else much. Certainly not on the masses. And this would be counteracting my nature, if it did.

Most important is knowing myself that I am strong, knowing my worth, knowing that I have something to contribute, knowing that what I am doing is well worth my while, and knowing I am not out to do something phenomenal or earth-shattering. 

Alice allowed herself to sink into the deep dark well of her inner world. She was listening in the darkness, listening for what she was ready to hear. She felt the presence of the Unseen Ones, perhaps she even felt Marshall’s presence. Her morning confidence had dissipated.  She felt confirmation of her strength though. She is strong in spirit and strong in mind, and she does not have to be working all the time. She needs to draw back into to her rural environment once more and curb her wanderings in outer space. She is losing touch and wasting time. There are other things to attend to. Alice is listening, Alice is trying to be attentive, Alice wishes to do the next right thing.

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